Wednesday, January 23, 2013


Hey guys,

It's been awhile. It's been awhile on Instagram too.
Haven't been posting anything lately because I don't think I'm at the best state currently.
So to not remind myself how bad I look, I decided to not take any pictures.

Had a show last weekend, and maybe it's the makeup, or maybe it's just me not having enough sleep, not drinking enough water, or maybe it's the weather etc. I'm having breakout even before my menses. This is horrible :'(

It bothers me a lot when I have breakouts cause obviously, I have to pile on more makeup and that makes me feel shitty cause I don't like to have a lot of products on my face. But if I don't do that, I would never feel good enough to leave house. And I went for facial last night, and the act of removing the breakouts and pimples aggravated the skin enough more, so I look rather pathetic today...

So last night, I've got the weirdest and scariest dream ever. I dreamt of my boyfriend cheating. Ok, in the dream, he didn't exactly cheat I think (since I only rmb bits and pieces of it). I just know there's a 3rd party involved and it's a lot about misunderstanding and shit but in the dream, I felt a whirlpool of emotions and it felt so surreal...

The moment I got up, I texted J. He was up and about for army already, telling him about the dream and what a nightmare it was. Then, when I got to office, I googled what the dream might mean even though, yes I know, it's not even recurring... lol me.

And guess what I found? I think this is just so true I feel embarrassed to share this with you guys, cause from this you could probably tell how low my self-esteem is right now. Probably down the gutters.

Dream Interpretation says, "Dreaming about catching your boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse with another partner probably indicates a deep seated anxiety on your part, either worry about your appearance, doubts about your attractiveness, or just generalized anxiety about the future."




Why so true. Bull's eye right there!

And before I even said anything to J, and I didn't want to share this interpretation with him cause I don't want to look like an attention-seeking vain child complaining about that few bits of breakouts, he texted me.

My remedy right there ♥

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