DON'T BE SHALLOW

A friend of mine recently spoke to me regarding his confused feeling for a girl. His best friend. He didn't understand if the jealousy he felt was a hint to the love he has for her or merely something else he couldn't fathom. Another friend suggested it has to be love, otherwise why the jealousy. I beg to differ. I told him, being jealous because of someone doesn't equate to love that way. We sure know of many different types of love, did you know jealousy too has different types?

Think about it. When your mom showers more attention to other siblings, jealousy takes over. Does that mean you wish to marry your mom? When your similar-gender best friend spends lesser time with you and more with others, jealousy takes over. Does that mean you're actually gay? When your good friend asks another friend out instead of you, jealousy takes over. Does that mean you're actually in love? No. You're not. You felt threatened, hence jealous. 

People do not understand the deeper meaning to the feelings they feel and jump into conclusions just by analyzing the surface of it. Things are not always what it seems. This brings me to my next example. My friends would hiss whenever I wonder how Jeremy is doing. I would think how he's doing, is he coping well. I do wish so. I would wonder if he's ever going to change, or if he's going to find someone who fits perfectly into his life. I wonder when he's going to stop partying and drinking so much, or if he's spending more time with his parents nowadays, or how's he doing with his friends; well or are they still as superficial, or is he still thinking to migrate to start over. Some friends of mine would then infer such thoughts as "Irina, you're not over him" and here, let me explain and spell it out to y'all once and for all, how I would see this as.

Have you had a friend who was once so close and now a stranger? And, you would sometimes wonder how he/she is doing? Yes, precisely. I am just doing the same thing. Jeremy was a friend before he was a lover. So, now tell me how is my doing, equates to me not being over him, when I'm just concerning for a fellow who was once dearly a part of me like a good friend? I never liked those accusations or remarks, for it shows how shallow those accusers are for not comprehending what it means to miss something you lost. You would miss a lost family member, pet, friend, so why is it a crime to think of a past lover? I would never deny something that was once a part of me, no matter how shameful it was.

About being over, I am already on my own two feet. That's all matters xx